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Mortimer's Emporium

by KPC

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1.
Position 02:01
2.
Get ready, get set 'cause the girl's got pep She's quiet but you can tell that she wants the pleasure I'm doing everything I can to impress her Because all I wanna to is slowly undress her I'll bet you that girl is at her best under pressure On your mark, get set, let her go, lemme get to it Here we go son, lemme spell it out & do it I'm taking a shot you suspect & you knew it I know you don't like it. but I gotta say screw it I'm ready get set we gonna work up a sweat There are so many things that I haven't done yet She's got the fire in her eyes that I wanna get Her mouth is dry but I know she's wet So thank you for hosting this special party But I'm impolite and now I'm starting To make a move, so there might be scarring I'm gonna take her now, so I'm sorry Charlie Get ready, get set 'cause the girl's got pep She checks me out when I start to dance She comes over so here's my chance You know I made my plans all in advance From my sequined vest to my leather pants I smell so fine from my head to toe I can tell that she loves it when she gets close I'm feeling kinda reckless so I touch her below My confidence is starting to overflow When we're so close, we are as one She's smiling so bright because we're having fun Her body's heat hits me like a megaton You think that we're competing? I've already won We find a room where it's warm & sweet I can tell she's ready, I can feel her heat As I touch her so nice on her heart's hard beats It's clear I am the new way & you are obsolete Get ready, get set 'cause the girl's got pep We fuck so long, til the party's over As we come out, indecent exposure You're as white & cold as the cliffs of Dover So I think it's time for a little closure You see, you did it wrong, not enough attention To this fine-ass woman, I need to mention Your cluelessness & incomprehension Now it's time for us to end all the tension There's a promise here that I want to keep You're not a wretch, you're not a creep But you're not the right one for her special needs Get ready, get set, so we can now proceed I'm sorry, I can understand your fear She is the design, I am the engineer The task at hand it couldn't be clearer Like Gang Starr says, step into the arena
3.
The Spoils 03:22
So, I'm in the arena with my raincoat on I am the king, I ain't your pawn I'll be your magic mirror on the wall Telling you everything you know is wrong Like Othello with his seven years' pith I've got the force 'cause I am your sith It doesn't matter how hard you fight me I'll take you down & tell you to bite me I wrecked the home before it was built By takin' your honey & wrapping her in silk Treating her like she's a real queen Riding around like I'm Jimmy Dean And I got a red jacket so everyone sees For you I aim to trouble, her I aim to please I've got to be first, I'm Ty Cobb they say Be careful or I'll spike you if you're in my way I got the honey & the ride & the radio's on Taking her to my place so we can get gone I got green tea, red wine, & even more stuff You say she likes it nice, she also likes it rough I put on a record & we start the foreplay 10, 20, 30 minutes, off with the lingerie I'll rub her with all kindsa oils 'Cause to the victor go the spoils Spoils, spoils, it's it's the spoils Now me & she, and the candles are lit She's glowing in the light with her shiny round tits We were meant to be together, kinda like it was fated I'm so clean it's like I'm sanitated But then was wants it dirty, so I crank the funk I got the satin hoodie, but I ain't no monk I have all her blessings, I begin the beguine Like Dexy it's time to come on Eileen Don't call me Mike, don't call me Ernesto I'm gonna put you all in my manifesto I'm like Karl Marx but without the boils 'Cause to the victor go the spoils Spoils, spoils, it's its the spoils Every second with her is like manna from heaven Maybe one time with you, with me it's seven We go so long into the deep night By now it's clear I am Mr. Right The sands of time in the hourglass And my hands they know her ass I find my identity around her labia And just like that I am Lawrence of Arabia We come together as we face the abyss I can feel us change, a metamorphosis I am the butterfly you are the gargoyle 'Cause to the victor go the spoils
4.
5.
Our Cocoon 02:52
You tell me that you just don't know how to change You say it's all etched in stone Everything we do to you must seem strange Like Dorothy Gale in a cyclone You head is spinning as we come together Two people so deep in love And you watch us coming out of our cocoon and we're gone Wrapped in shiny wings like a feather Or a hand inside the warmest glove Two chrysalis changing together Soon to be flying high above You can't see the cool things that we do here No matter how you try it'll never be enough And you watch us coming out of our cocoon and we're gone There is more to this world than you can see Watch us from outside maybe you'll believe Deep inside we grow with love and care We embrace the positive and reject despair There's nothing that can stop us if love is true With understanding there's nothing that we can't do So we turn from all the jealousy in your head And here we come breaking out of our bed And we'll rise so high up in the blue sky The sun will blind you if you look up & try To comprehend what's going on in our world Our love grows stronger as our wings unfurl In & out, right & left, up & down we'll go Puddling, patrolling, perching dynamos We'll be basking in each other as we migrate All of the world's problems we'll eliminate And you watch us coming out of our cocoon and we're gone
6.
It's a wonderful world but filled with predators I may not taste good but I'm still edible My wings carry me where I want to go But the wind can blow me to and fro Sometimes it's chance where I will land Could be in a place I have not planned If I lose my focus it could mean my end How far does the spider web extend? Where are all the enemies? The spiders, the monkeys? One eye on the prize The other on the trees Where are all the enemies? The spiders, the monkeys? One eye on the long grass The feeling of unease The freedom of the wild has its pros and cons No 9-to-5, but we still have jobs It might look like we are playing all day But we could be the hunter, we could be the prey Each new day could be our last We don't think about the future & we have no past We live in the moment cause it's all we know No time for Verdi or Vincent Van Gogh Where are all the enemies...
7.
We break out, free & flying so high no denying Reborn in the air like single socks we're multiplying Big changes that were happening inside Give us tiny eyes & provide that we're no longer hiding Stubby legs, antennae, all our growing is showing We got one mission in life to keep the cycle going We take the nectar, collecting, prospecting energy to succeed We gotta propagate the species Our love, our love, we're flying high on our love As a team, we dream of big things that remain Like not being just another part of the food chain From place to place, we leave a trace of our character But who sees? Maybe Henry David Thoreau or David Attenborough I don't know, whether we're fast or slow, here we go It's a mariposa not poso So we continue to go from club to club, tree to tree Looking for a place to lay it down it's what we need We live for one reason, one season, believing What we do is the meaning of life and it's pleasing When you live for two weeks, you seek the only joy You seek to create, and not to destroy It simplifies the things that you care about It doesn't give you time to feel the hatred & the doubt We stay within our selves & our little space Because all we need to do is procreate Our love, our love, we're flying high on our love Perhaps there's a message for the world in our story There's no posturing, there's no hope for glory Only frutty, & duty, to get the butterfly booty It's not about the power, it's all about the beauty Bringing happiness and zen to every meadow you see From flower to flower, us and the bumblebees Though our life is short, yes my friends it's true By seeing us maybe we can help you get through If there's a moral to this story it's to not think too much Don't let your thoughts become your crutch Just watch us fly & find our mate Be carried by the wind, not bogged down by weight Maybe we're all here to do this one thing Having fun together and spreading our wings Making life continue in the sexiest way Doing it together each & every day Our love, our love, we're flying high on our love
8.
I aim for comfort, and I aim for speed All the pretty women yes they have the need To feel my engine, to feel me go When I'm driving I'm in control When her pants are off I got the bump stop She never says no when she feels me drop To a lower gear, I'm not insincere And we pace ourselves so there is no fear I feel all around her hairpin curves She's got so many to observe I got the balance so I shake her rig She's rubbing all over my thingamajig We gotta slow down or I might peel out The road is slick on this sexy route I start to touching her slip angle I see all her bits jingle jangle Race, race, race, race....it's the race! All the trips we take around the track I feel her front, her sides, her back Her inside, outside, top & bottom When I get going there ain't no stoppin' I feel the friction & then we're drifting She's got her hands on the stick shifting She wants her headlights realigned I want the cup, the burn, & the grind The speed's intense, we're both all sweaty Hot Italian Mario Andretti I take the turns at top velocity While she's down showing her generosity I'm looking for a weakness to exploit I handle her like I'm A.J. Foyt I grip her tighter we go another lap I feel the pressure on my blasting cap Race, race, race, race....it's the race! I see the white flag & I hit the pedal The car is thumping & a little unsettled Sexy is my motor & it's running red-hot I keep pushing without a second thought But don't worry baby no one's getting hurt I got the smoke like I'm Tony Stewart Now in the distance there's a checkered flag I feel the place start to zig & zag I grip her tight like a steering wheel And there she comes, in my ear a squeal On the last turn I feel the tries burn And we've reach the point of no return Like Stoker Ace, I flip her over For one last gun of the motor And then the world is just me & Danica We cross the finish line, we are the leaders
9.
You can try to go numb or you can try to run away I can honestly tell you that it's better if you stay Do you feel like you're frozen in a world that keeps changing? Plaguing, staging, and re-arranging Let me remind you it's an incredible place From the wonders of the world to your beautiful face For us the earth can spin in a whole new way Look within ourselves to find what we can create Free your mind, now's the time To come together, where we all shine If it's hard to look around & see all the hate And the king on the throne won't abdicate Rise up & shout about how you truly feel Otherwise those in power will continue to steal It's true humankind can crave money & power But the Earth itself creates things like flowers And the clouds above are amazing to think about The mountains everywhere erase senseless doubt You can find reason to believe in everything you see So never give up because of the negativity So called leaders they will come & they will go But the Earth is a constant so don't give up hope If we join as one to tell them what we really need There's no way we can lose our humanity So remember that life is the greatest gift of all So it's okay to cry out when you take a fall Free your mind, now's the time To come together, where we all shine It's true all people will never see eye to eye And there are so many things that make us wanna cry But keep you head up high & the sun will shine The rich & the poor all have good & bad times Don't think about what they have that you haven't got Love, compassion & respect they can't be bought Keep pushing for freedom, human rights & wisdom And yes you'll realize you can change the system Public ignorance is what bad leaders depend on Like conspiracy theories & religious lies Just be sure to learn all you can And keep an open mind Free your mind, now's the time To come together, where we all shine
10.
There's money and there's sex, there's power & there's freedom There's little else pushing anyone to give a breadcrumb What's in it for you, what's in it for me? These are the sermons of our shattering The lost letters The forgetters The upsetters You got me all turned around The lost letters The forgetters The upsetters Rising up from the underground Does it matter how it started? The clock it still ticks We talk & talk for hours without a real fix Unless there's someone who wants to do the work The thinkers all say "Yeah we knew it" & smirk And the world will burn while we cling to survive You conceptual thinkers won't be left alive The people who slaved to do the work for you Are the only ones who know how to follow through The lost letters... We've forgotten how to do the things that are right Acceptable behavior's now soulless spite Do you understand you can't be rich when there's nothing? And at the gates of hell you'll claim it's all bluffing It's so easy to forget our history & claim righteousness And make the same mistakes again nevertheless Soon all that's left is to start to rebuild After all the pompous asses are taken out & grilled The lost letters... There's forbidden love, secrets and sacrifice Past and present, not once or twice Poor villains, they want your sympathy Creation myths, & possible deities The lost letters...
11.
12.
I'm searching for the clues to a hidden treasure Could it be life's meaning & can it be measured? Does the prize have a value that's more than money? Is it the destination & not the journey? I've traveled far, I've traveled wide There are so many places for things to hide Could it be deeper than anyone can go Or harder than any person can know I don't know what I will find Unanswered questions or peace of mind I'll fly straight into the mist Eyes wide open as I face the abyss I know there are haunted things ahead They might be alive they could be dead So many have tried and disappeared Or came back insane & full of fear It could be named Cthulhu or Alison I will unearth it with my talisman Whatever comes up I will intercept The stories it tells we must accept I don't know what I will find... I realize there were many before me Looking for fame, hope or glory I'll get the past the traps inside the mind And the words some use to hypnotize I'll grab the idol as my skin grows colder And run out the cave before the boulder Maybe the true meaning lies within Something like free will or original sin I don't know what I will find... As I descend the nine circles of hell To find myself, and you as well Will it be a wasteland of treachery & doom? Or nature abhorring a vacuum? Will I find myself or that it's all a dream? Will I howl with laughter or a silent scream? All I want is to feel you & your kiss As I plunge inside & face the abyss I had a dream that I was collecting metadata on an ancient ceramic goose. It came to life & bit me on the neck....
13.
If I don't come home I'll miss this place But I gotta do the work to keep up the pace But if I die out there I've got a plan It's something about keeping up the lifespan Gotta do it for the future generations My friends, my lovers & closest relations My body may be broken & I will be forgotten But the cycle continues though it may be rotten I'm not sure if that's beautiful or creepy But there's no point in all of that crying & weeping It's time for my final ride Arms & legs grip onto the stem All my senses are magnified I know it's time for the end Please don't cry, please don't frown Now begins my final hour The seasons change I'm broken down And my essence becomes the world flower I was born to shake my pollenator I am the flyer, I am the creator I'm less concerned with surviving than living About my life not a single misgiving Within all this is a fundamental truth No one survives life, the aged or the youth So I gotta do the work until the last With bringing new life I am unsurpassed Did we have fun baby? Yes we did. We found each other & we had more than kids We brought the life force from one to another All of us in a way are sisters and brothers It's time for my final ride... I no longer have the time or energy I can fly no longer actually So I crawl to the place where I hatch my plan I hope that everybody here understands I will lie & I will die but it's okay Others will benefit from my decay Let me tell you, I was born when I met you When our eyes first met, we knew what to do, what to do... We felt so much it made life so deep I hope that I never made you feel cheap You were a real cute kitty from butterfly city There are so many more words for you than pretty We had so many good times being together We flew from the weed, we flew from the heather Doing the things that we love to do You were my wooly bear, my love was true There was so much sex, so much romance And now the years have performed their terrible dance I remember every detail, alpha female You had the best wings, you could never fail What you had was funky, what you had was strong We had so much fun we could never do wrong We had a can of kick ass & it was the best But now my love I lay down & rest It's time for my final ride... Just because I die it doesn't mean I'm not part of the living There's a part of me that will forever remain A part of me I'm giving Take my nectar from your roots & begin again In the end all we are links in the chain Is that something you can comprehend I used to carry the nectar now it carries me To keep the cycle going it's what we need Like so many pages from a book are torn One dies, one lives, and even more are born We're in this together, it goes on & on After every sunset there will be another dawn Some will call me fertilizer, some called me friend Now it's time for me to go, this is the end.

about

This year's album is inspired by late 80s/early 90s psychedelic funky hip hop, except I couldn't afford to sample any of those 70s funk records, & I played all the drums instead of using drum machines.

credits

released March 14, 2023

Written, recorded & performed* by KPC in 2022
*vocals by Stef on "Position"
Mastered by Todd Tobias
Thanks to Zack & Maya for the cover art
Frizzle Records FRIZ-0038

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KPC Princeton, New Jersey

Unrefined Bedroom Pop.

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